Selfish Selfless

Lots of people confuse different actions and emotions with others, and in this way of thinking and forming ideas about self, others, the world around, damage their personal wellbeing from many levels; while not all are the same, the issues that arrive to these are more or less somewhat correlated, and in understanding, a potential to identify the errors, becomes more optional.

Selfless is often idealized as a form to be if you really are: *insert whatever labels suit the emotions attempted to be swindled in some manner*; some examples: “a good person”, “a good Christian”, etc. Simultaneously, “Selfless” is defined as accepting whatever treatment and circumstances with a grateful and welcoming manner, and to give one self and all we are away with no regard; an “interesting” way to manipulate emotionally, others.

Along these definitions and standardizing of what “selfless” is, also comes the broad attempt to then assimilate these into other aspects that are of benefit to people, society, civilization, to further the concept of what “a good person is”, as defined by those with alter intentions, and often indoctrinated from a young age; the maintenance of a system and status, and the instilling of helplessness, and the views of extreme ends, that bring no advancement, but deter and harm from both sides – self destruction in anger and harmful takes, in giving away with no regard of the balance behind those actions.

To love and to be selfless can be seen as also mindful and observant of the long term value added on actions chosen; simultaneously understanding that in an imperfect world, protecting and standing up are necessary, as those who do not care to respect boundaries of what is of others will not mind to continue their harmful journey, and ultimately the balance of life that allows a society to grow and to thrive, diminishes at the hands of parasite like individuals.

I can love my child, but I also have to nurture their instincts; living in a society that is often guided by corruption and destruction, it is necessary to show the broader picture of what truly is beneficial, necessary and what is the opposite, for which “necessary” becomes unpleasant.

I can love a partner, but ultimately their respect in true application of my feelings, as much as mine in an equal, without harm of self, theirs, it will be misery, and the attempt to validate it with: “it is what it is”, “people fight all the time”, “people are different”, “relationships are difficult”, or even more enabling, and self destructive welcoming Stockholm syndrome like behaviour, like: “it’s temporary”, “they’ll change”, “there are other people in like situations”, “it’s just opinion”,etc, will still not take away the truth that is at the root; that not matter the image, the attachment/ addiction, and fears, what we are as whole to self and others, has to be equally matched in what we receive, to be truly “Selfless”, truly balanced and fulfilling, not about: “a ti for a ta”, but in the sense of value and true meaning; in any expectation of attempting to make it as an unbalanced exchange, it’s abusive, and an attempt to validate such actions as okay – psychological manipulation.

Can people accept their lesser actions, decision, thinking – indoctrination?

Whether yes or not, can they accept that the root of their advancement or disadvantage lays at the root of accepting what is for what it is, and that means awareness without self deprecating and/ or denial of facts and necessary actions as follow up, as painful as they are to emotions and/ or ego?

Regardless, “it is what it is”, and there’s nothing that can change neither the outcomes in true measure, nor the follow up of those by standard – “if you put your hand in water, it will get wet, even if you close your eyes and pretend it’s not water but air, and people around you twirl, aligned, believing with you the same”; even if you believe in a deity, God isn’t there trying to reason your wrongs in either extreme, for your self absorbed reasons, be in enacting or enabling.

If someone is a “selfless” person, they will make a point of knowing that if they truly care, they do not enable what isn’t of true value short and long term to all, detached of self interests, and beliefs – even in faith, or lack of.

If others believe that selfless is detached of giving to one part they are receiving benefit from, they can certainly accept that detachment can also be then from the self centered belief that enabling wrong, denying harmful actions is selfless, and simultaneously understand that addressing wrong doing is part of being truly aware and in the process of addressing it, benefiting outside the self – “Selfless”, detached of emotional swindle of selfish views of image perceptions, in a plastic, corrupt, scamming society; for those who believe in deities and/ or follow philosophies/ school of thoughts, the same is derivated.

Even in the less pragmatic exchanges, those with liking to take and validate it as “selfless” gain from those who are “pure and giving”, can understand that only parasites sit on a source, drain it/ depleting it, adding no value, and destroying it, continuing like patterns from “host” to “host”.

Labeling self destructive patterns with fancy wording like: “Selfless Giver”, “Lover”, “Caring”, “Nurturing”, and so on, will not change the facts of these been mere attempts at manipulating thinking rationality of others to enable their exploitation, while attempting to block their own self awareness and understanding of what is their best person forward, and what is turning a blind eye on wrongs; be towards themselves, environment, and/ or others.

All in all, to be truly “Selfless”, one has to simultaneously include and exclude oneself, our surroundings, and others.

To be excluding of selfish intent, to be inclusive of self awareness, outer awareness, and self respect, together in every exchange.

~Angel Pendragon~☀️
06.22.2023 ~ 07:20
Toronto,ON, Canada

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